Let's stay this way forever.""We accept each other's faults completely.That's why we get along so well.""We'll never allow anything to separate us."These kinds of comments are what most romantic idealists would savor.The couple often does not realize their problems stem from the boredom they have unwittingly created.
The intimacy of security has replaced the thrill of discovery, and made them vulnerable to losing the love they have created.
When people have given up challenge and discovery in exchange for security, they are in danger of investing less energy because the relationship does not demand it.
The partners in a new relationship are initially very willing to embrace whatever adventures their interaction may bring.
They are attracted to the challenge of discovering each other, and continuously experience new thoughts, actions, and feelings.
Why do Committed Partners Choose Security over Continued Discovery? The partners in established relationships are comfortable knowing what to expect and able to handle whatever situations evolve.
The ordinary struggles of life are enough for the partners to combat together, and unexpected ones are uncomfortably challenging.
Unfortunately, they maintain the trance state that can discourage further relationship growth.
The partners saying them to each other believe that their familiarity and predictability more than compensates for the loss of the of excitement they once so avidly pursued.
That process is difficult enough for individuals when they have only themselves to consider.